They just don’t make ‘em like they used to…

I LOVE the internet. Earlier tonight Jackie was commenting on how she doesn’t understand why people like the internet so much and get so addicted to it. Here I have a perfect example of why the internet is a fantastic thing. I found these absolute fantastic movies on one of the torrent sites…

OMFG IT’S A MIDGET WESTERN!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously. If it weren’t for the internet I would never have found this 1938 beauty. Do you see that picture in the upper right hand portion of that poster? The horse one? Yeah, that’s right, there’s six freaking midgets riding that horse!!!!! Oh how awesome!

More!

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“Comment:

This is a Brazilian movie, starring the Three Stooges of Brazil : The Tramps. The movie starts out with a car chase in which the Tramps are being followed. After the car chase the Tramps encounter Prince Flik (an alien) who is locked in an epic battle with Zuco, over a Brain computer. Flik is there to recruit people to help him (and the princess) to fight Zuco.

This movie was intended for children or for brain-fried drug users, since it makes very little sense. It is very much a Star Wars clone, except without any logic and obviously meant as a comedy. Most of the characters have Star Wars counterparts. Prince Flik is obviously a Luke-lookalike and Zuco is Darth Vader, except wearing more gold and having various motor skill problems. There is also a Chewbacca lookalike, lots of Tuskins (who can forget the Tuskin fight scene … that will NOT end ???!!!), and Princess Leia. The director uses slow motion shots, reverse shots, fast forwards, dumb sound effects (hitting sounds included “boink”, “dink”, and “ping”) and triple takes to “move” the story along. I have not even mentioned the slow-motion fight scenes, complete with boxes full of drop-kicks (provided by the drop kick champion, William Shatner <<OMFG!  -Bob>>). The music sounds like a 70’s disco night in Cairo, Egypt.

The main problem with this movie is the length. It is an 88 minute long movie. There are scenes that seem to go on forever with little to no resolution. One such scene is the “Tuskin” village fight/kidnapping. Another would be the trip to the “space disco” (Mos Eisley). The scene is at least 10 minutes long, in which the aliens do the alien “disco”. The alien disco would be like two zombies trying to dance. The Tramps then proceed to monopolize the dance floor, by doing the human disco. This then all turns into a bar fight, complete with drop kicks, slow motion, triple takes and the annoying “sound” effects. I am not even going to get into where the Tramp’s female companions came from and what they’re suppose to be doing. Most of the fight scenes consist of Dolemite-like hand to hand fighting or bonking someone on the head with a stick (there also some Stooge-like slapping). One of the strangest scenes has to be Didi’s purchase of arms from an arms dealer. During the random scene (at the space disco) he shoots 5 aliens and a vehicle, all to test the weapons. When his attempt to pay for the weapons with human money is rejected, he then shoots the arms dealer.

This movie is slightly better than Turkish Star Wars, but not by much. They both drag and have nonsensical plots. For what its worth, enjoy this movie with others and with plenty of medicine nearby. ”